The Types of Fans

With the playoffs under way in MLB, I thought I would break down the types of fans Bill Simmons-style. Being a Bills and a Braves fans, I've been all over the map and on the happy to devastated scale and could be among the most qualified to do this ... probably. So here we go.

The Winners
At the end of the day, there's only one team in each league that's totally satisfied: the champs. Now, you can further break down the types of winners based on the importance of the title. Don't get me wrong, all titles are specials, but I don't think anyone would argue with that some are better than others. So here we go:

The Guerilla Off the Back

The '04 Sox fans will never be able to
recapture the joy of that title.

There's nothing better than getting that guerilla off your back for the first time whether it's the first title ever or the first in a long, long, long time. I think the reaction of New Orleans' fans last year say it all. This is the only situation where all generations are experiencing the joy of a title for the first time and the elation of accomplishing something that they never thought would happen.

First Title of Your Lifetime
You always remember your first. No matter how much the old-timers tell you about the glory days of your franchise, you never fully own it. Not until your team wins the title under your watch for the first time. Then its your title, something you earned.

First Title in 20+ Years
Important note, this can only apply to 30 and up for obvious reasons. But this is the point where you're beginning to forget what it feels like to win and you're beginning to think it will never happen again. Then comes the sweet reminder.

Been There, Done That
Don't get me wrong, it's still sweet, but it's more like a great buzz than the pure elation of the top three levels. It's the one thing I can hold over Yankees fans. All the titles they win will never feel better than when the Bills win Super Bowl LXV.

The Losers
Nobody likes to lose ... except for maybe Cubs fans. So when your team is finally done for the year it hurts no matter what. But some are less painful than others. Allow me to break it down:

Recent Champs
It's a long-held fact of fandom that if you've won a title in the last 10 years, you cannot complain about not winning until your 10 year window is up. Still in the warm afterglow of a title, it numbs the pain of being eliminated. At least it should, but it can lead to one of our later levels.

Glad-to-Be-Here Playoff Team
When you haven't been to the playoffs in 10 or more years, just getting there is almost as good as winning a title. This can also be said of teams that over-achieved and the fans know it. Losing is going to hurt but you're so pumped to just make the playoffs that you'll convince yourself that this is the first step to an inevitable title, which is a slippery slope to the bottom of this list.

Pessimistic Fans
You have absolutely no faith in your team and therefore you're numb when they lose. Great example of this is the Bills this year. I'm have no confidence that the Bills will win a single game this year. This makes each loss less painful albeit more embarrassing. It's easier to deal with an even level of emotions than a roller coaster which is why I'll always maintain that it's much easier to be a Lions fan than a Bills fan.

Spoiled Fans

LeBron James is a Yankees fan so you
know how hard it is. It's not like he' a
front-runner or anything. He's was also
Bulls and Cowboys fan in the 90s ...
wait a minute ...

This is a franchise that has been so successful recently that they expect to win every single year. When they don't, they take it fairly badly, much to the chagrin of long-suffering fans who have never won. The perfect example is the '03 - '08 Yankees. If you ever heard talk radio coming out of the City in that timeframe, you would think they were the Cubs.

Atlanta Braves Syndrome
I couldn't come up with a better name so bare with the bias. As you'll recall, the Braves won 14 consecutive division titles in the 90s and early 00s. All of these opportunities resulted in exactly 1 title. This is tough to explain to someone who's never won a title but getting all those chances and blowing 13 out of 14 of them hurts pretty bad. Don't believe me? Ask a Colts fan.

Great Expectations, Huge Disappointment
There's nothing worse than finally making it to the top of the game, seeing all the experts pick you, and then coming up short. The worst part of this one is that the team has convinced you that this is the year. This year, they're going to get it done. Then when they're finally eliminated you're blindsided. See: 2001 Mariners.

Tortured Fans

This is just an average day in a Cubs
fan's life

There are only a handful of franchises that fall to this level. Many teams have unjustifiably label themselves tortured franchises but only 9 actually are (counting only the NBA, MLB, and NFL; you know, the real leagues). To qualify, you need to: 1) have no titles in the last 30 years; 2) lose in stunning fashion on a consistent basis and 3) continue to get near greatness only to have it ripped away from you. Using this criteria, I've come up with the following franchises in the three important sports leagues (in no particular order): Bills, Indians, Browns, Cavs, Cubs, Vikings, Knicks, Eagles, SF Giants.

This Year's Playoff Crew
So where do this year's playoff teams fit in on the fan scale? Here's what I got:

Yankees and Phils - Recent Champs
Braves, Rangers and Reds - Glad-to-be-Here
Twins - Atlanta Braves Syndrome
Giants - Tortured Fans
Rays - N/A: don't have fans
*if they did, they would fit in Great Expectations, Huge Disappointment